March 9, 2007
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Much like thinlizzy, I am going out of town, although not for anything involving any sort of asshat. And we also have to leave tomorrow. And we also leave at four a.m. Similarly still, an unfortunate part in all of this is that packing is im-fucking-possible.
First, it's been in the high 60s to low 70s the last few days. I've been wearing gauchos and flip flops. We're heading into weather that's predicted to be in 30s to 40s. I'm having trouble coordinating layers. My last resort was to concede defeat and vow to throw on my jacket if I can't put enough clothes on to keep warm.
Second, we have a dinner on Friday, a party on Saturday, and a whole bunch more days to spend afterwards. Fella and I are traveling for a total of 7 days. And the first portion of the Chicago program strongly emphasizes appearance(s). You see, my almost-90-year-old-grandma is very much invested in appearances. So I have to try to appear as svelte as Zestily possible (which is quite difficult seeing as how I am in fact quite zaftig). And I have to appear as stylish as possible, not an easy feat when you are jobless, destitute, and insolvent. Bottom line: I am stressing about it. So much so, that I have lost the will to even go on this trip.
But that's only the half of it. Here is...The Rest of the Story.
As I've mentioned previously, Fella is a nervous wreck. To begin with, he isn't keen on air travel. On top of that, he is overly concerned with making a good impression on my aunts, uncles, and some of my cousins. In fact, I think he's more worried about the latter than he is about the former. That is, at least, until we get on the plane in a few hours. And sadly, his nerves are getting on my nerves.
Not it the sense that Fella's annoying me, rather that his nerves are rubbing off on me. And I am a bundle of nervous energy. It certainly doesn't help that I haven't slept well this week. And that I've been quite morose, as well. It must be postbartum depression, sparked by the realization that I am (as previously mentioned) jobless, destitute, and insolvent.
Perhaps the only consolation is that I'm taking only four pairs of shoes for a seven-day trip. If only I weren't nervous that I haven't packed enough...of everything.
Comments (2)
wait...was tomorrow today? or tomorrow tomorrow? late night posts confuse me because are they part of the day before or the day after?
at any rate, i am sure once you get there, you will have a fabulous time and everything will go swimmingly. happy travels! and try not to let relatives' criticisms get to you.
"postbartum depression" too clever! i think i am suffering from it as well! it just all seems so...anticlimatic. not to mention, i am having a hard time keeping my resolution of keeping up with the studying!
OK...I am putting on my "mom hat"....do NOT let Grandma...or anyone else make you feel like your appearance is anything less than wonderful!!! Just smile, and love her, and have a great time on your visit!! Tell Fella that he has already impressed the most important member of the family...YOU!!!! Have a great time on your trip....and come home with a heart full of wonderful memories!!!
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